Well, my previous attempt at rhetoric deviated catastrophically into a Spergy info dump, so let’s try again.
Q: When an idiot brands you with the scarlet R, what is the optimally sadistic amygdala-hijacking response?
A: No, I’m not a racist. In fact, have you heard about the genocide of the Khoisan people? They look like black Asians, but they are the most genetically diverse people on Earth. They used to have the biggest population too, all over southern Africa, but now they’ve been reduced to just a tiny island.
Why? Because when the modern black Bantus came down, they decided the San weren’t human, and started EATING them. And haven’t stopped for 300 years. Why? Because Bantu IQ is 71 and San IQ is 56. That’s a 25% difference.
That’s why the full title of Darwin’s book “On the Origins of the Species” was: “And the Preservation of Favored RACES in the Struggle for Life”.
See, you don’t love science. And you don’t love black people. You just SECRETLY hate a certain kind of white people – the wrong kind. Specifically, white straight male Republican Creationist NASCAR rednecks. Why? Because the winners of the Civil War are still the winners, and still letting everybody know. Feels good to be a winner, right? Feels safe.
Isn’t it funny how America’s biggest war, worse than all the others combined, could determine your most dearly held religious beliefs 150 years later? It’s almost like you didn’t choose them or think for yourself at all.
Anne Frank did 9/11. Wake up.
(I’m dead serious about the last line. When a drowning man reaches for a lifeline, piss on his head. Deflect all attempts at recovery by riffing on how Anne Frank planned and committed the perfect crime.)
Idiot: Now you’re just fucking with me, haha.
Sadist: Am I? Or did I just say something so true, you can’t even process it? Just put that in the back of your mind, forget all about it, and let it eat at you like a tumor. Then one day, when you’re an old man and your life is done, you’ll look back and suddenly realize that it was all a lie.
Hat tip to 4chan for the interrupt. Check out their Twitch raids on Youtube. I masturbate to this.