** A meandering transition
Apropos nothing, claiming that the Problem of Evil disproves Christianity is about as intelligent as saying the Matrix I is unrealistic because people can’t actually fly.
When I started creating the Koanic Soul meditation system, I thought, “This stuff will be universal.” Just as, when I first encountered Tex’s Neanderthal theory, I thought, “Aha, we are all Neanderthals.” In both cases, the initial insight merely broke the first ground in a tremendously complex field.
Now it is obvious that my particular Koanic Soul solution is tailored to my exact anthropometric traits. The question is whether the solution is transferable to others with the same traits, or whether they must develop their own culturally-customized solutions. I even doubt whether the process, iterating symbols on hands, transfers to other Forerunner types.
When I look at what Illuminatus is doing, it’s clear he’s pursuing a Starchild-flavored solution to Neanderthal mostly-occipital dysfunction, just as I pursue a parietal-flavored solution to Neanderthal mostly-deepsocket dysfunction. Our solution paths do not much resemble each other. His is based on a subjective process of holistic identity weaving, mine on perfecting black-and-white static hierarchical symbols. Nevertheless, our goal is the same – freedom from trauma and dysfunction caused by the exposure of a partially Neanderthal psyche to toxic modernity. One could easily consider the Thallish Mark Manson a third point on this axis, with yet another rhyming but distinct solution path.
Thus, rather than creating a one-off solution, I believe I have opened a new field – Edenic psychopraxis.
Right now, only a few high IQ introspective pioneers can succeed in this sort of complete psychological bootstrapping. From these pioneers, we gain tremendous insight into how to fix each type. Eventually, I hope that skilled practitioners will be able to combine these data points to create customized programs guiding ingenopathic Forerunner clients out of the trauma state and into pacific adaptation to modernity.
All that may be a long way off, and it will develop in tandem with the separatist movement, another path to psychological healing. But at least now I know what I’m doing, and what I’m not.
** The center symbol
Let’s start with the heart symbol. This stands for the personal boundary that divides soul from world, as described in Dr. Paul’s MindOS, which David DeAngelo touts. I highly recommend the book. Ingenopaths tend to have a porous boundary, taking on the problems and emotions of their immediate tribemates as their own. This does not work in modernity.
The spikes or thorns on the heart represent the masculine crusty exterior, a correction for ingenopathic niceguy syndrome.
Next, “TT”. This stands for “Targeted Tongues”. When the heavily left-brain anxiety-driven rational monologue loop begins to obsess on something, TT hijacks the verbal stream into glossolalia (heard silently in the mind, not spoken aloud). This halts a negative psychological cycle, and sublimates the problem or issue back into the holistic and subconscious emotional processing of the entire brain, which is far better equipped to deal with such issues in a healthy manner.
It is important not to overuse TT. It is not an active strategy. It is not a gun one can point at any environmental problem to magically solve. Rather, it is an automatic response to a certain negative psychological behavior. All it does is remove that behavior. Thanks to my deep sockets, that behavior comes up quite often, so I use it a lot.
The next is “cc”, which stands for “corpus callosum”. The corpus callosum is the connective tissue between right and left brain hemispheres. With my low digit ratio, very deep eye sockets, and decent facial testosterone, I have a highly masculinized brain structure. This reduces inter-hemisphere communication, and increases intra-hemisphere communication. In other words, the two hemispheres tend to be cut off from each other. I thus have excellent pain dissociation and surface toughness. However, toxic modernity trauma creates a state where the two hemispheres tend to diverge too much, creating painful emotional and intellectual dissonance, and cannot be brought into synchronization. I have described this state in detail in my Ohmoe tank post.
I find that by centering meditative awareness inbetween the two hemispheres, I can bring them into much better alignment. Instead of relying on one or the other side, I rely on the middle, which is merely a communicative channel between both, with no capacity of its own. This results in an empty, pacific mind like water – which is actually the non-turbulent unimpeded flow of subconscious mental activity.
I realize the corpus callosum meditation may sound a bit mystifying and be elusive in practice. I’ve described it as best I can, but it’s up to you to actually do it. The description of riding a bike is not the same as riding the bike.
Anyhow, as usual this meditative technique cannot be over-relied upon. cc is not the end-all, be-all. It is not the one stable foothold, to use the metaphor at the beginning of part I. Nevertheless it corrects an important psychological dysfunction.
Next, RA, which stands for “right action”. The simplicity of this koan is comforting to my perfectionistic drive. I am not called to perfection in everything – I just need to do the right thing. Simultaneously, it inspires my innate enthusiasm for righteousness. It focuses away from introspection and towards… right action.
Next is PI, which stands for “protagonistic imaging”. This corrects a psychological error that tends to happen immediately after I think “right action”. Due to my deepsocket nature, I start immediately doing a left-brain rational-verbal analysis of right action paths, and the ambiguities inherent therein. This can quickly lead to uncertainty, self-doubt, anxiety, attempts to resolve the unresolvable, etc.
PI simplifies all that, by taking the thoughtstream from the verbal to the visual. Instead of analyzing, I visualize myself (protagonist) in a movie doing the right things. Due to the narrowness of human visual capacity, I cannot explore many branches, and must instead be definite and specific, removing anxiety and uncertainty. Thus I harness my subconscious decision maker to form the image, and simply follow its lead.
This process is no more infallible than anything else mortal man does, but it produces better results than my default left-brain method. Since it is the best decision-making mode available, and not susceptible to conscious intervention, my perfectionism drive accepts it as a stable Schelling point and falls silent.
At the bottom of the stack, “PC”. This stands for political correctness, and means that I kowtow my body, and soul into a smug sophistical pretzel in obeisance before the dictats of the diversity commissars and their testicularly and/or evolutionarily challenged Designated Victim Groups.
Just kidding. It stands for “Passion Christ”. The RA and PI koans left me in a too executional, inhuman mode, so I needed some way to reinject emotional life. The best model I have for a man with well balanced emotion and action is Jesus Christ, so I adopted him as my model. PC reminds me to experience my deep feelings. Otherwise I tend to ignore them, leading to desync of hemispheres, amongst other problems.
We are nearing the end, brave spelunkers into the weird caves of the hybrid psyche. To refresh our map:
You see a small “c” and “i” to the left and right of the “TT”. The “i” stands for isolation. When depressive affect threatens productivity during social isolation, this reminds me to speak tongues aloud. It is an effective antidote. Somehow tongues expresses the suppressed emotion and provides a degree of comfort. It is not always necessary; only in the situation described above. Avoid overreliance – praying in tongues aloud all the time when alone is too distracting.
The “c” stands for “close [things]“. Such as closing eyes, windows on the computer, etc. This is a trigger activated when I am struggling to go to bed. I may slip on the blindfold and pass out for a bit on the couch, if I can’t make the bed yet. Basically, it reduces the going to bed process to tiny chunks that are easy to start. I may not be able to do the whole routine, but I can at least close my eyes for a bit. It makes it ok to do just those small steps, instead of stressing anxiously about failure to complete the whole sequence, which then can lead to more self-destructive late-night entertainment/stimulation seeking.
I have had more trouble with going to bed than most, due to health problems creating simultaneous fatigue and insomnia, and this is the best possible meditative solution. Anything heavier is counterproductive, and nothing at all isn’t enough. This gets the job done, to the extent biologically possible. Of course there are many other external methods one can use to enforce bedtime; here I discuss only the internal.
Lastly, on the left and right of the heart symbol are divided two halves of the word “water”. I needed a way to relate the three symbol stacks together. “Water” means that the left and right flow awareness, as water flows downhill, towards the center, where it pools and collects. This removes any anxiety or uncertainty about how to look at and experience the symbols. There is always one answer: move from outward to inner, by gentle downward flow. It removes any rigidity and blockiness that might otherwise make the meditation herky-jerky, rather than organic and smooth. This is crucial, since the meditation is too large to be held in the mind simultaneously. Smooth switching between focus on different parts was a longstanding challenge in my koan design, which “water” resolves.
** The combined effect – a foothold
Together, the three symbols provide a stable, permanent, unchanging, reliable psychological foundation or footing. I can stand on it, and do. I rest my weight upon it. Yet my weight does not bear down heavily, because the koans remove the anxiety that creates excessive desperate dependencey. Rather, I maintain a light pressure or awareness, much like the son of Gaia whom Hercules wrestled, who was unbeatable as long as one foot was on the ground. I need only leave on foot on the koans; the other is free for the business of the moment.
Thus, the only conscious direct willpower I need exert is to keep this foot on the ground, which is a perfectly manageable task. The rest is handled subconsciously and automatically. When a more severe psychological crisis threatens, I simply look down at the symbols until order restore itself. Due to my nature, I do not experience psychological crises during combat or survival type emergencies, but rather when doubts about my Heaven-Earth alignment arise. So this works out fine.